DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL (SPIRITUAL CRISIS AND REBIRTH)
By Laura Marie of the Harmonic Universe Academy - November 2015
When we go through our spiritual awakening, rarely is the process only joy and ecstasy. The awakening of a human to its true nature, while he has been conditioned and programmed since birth with fake belief systems about his identity, can not be without internal turmoil or indeed without a real and profound existential crisis. This also holds true for the human collective consciousness in general. To believe the spiritual awakening of an entire civilisation is possible without profound worldwide crises happening in all fields would be utopian.
Today, this is what humanity is facing. A Reawakening to its true nature, its true dimension, and to the manipulations it has been suffering for centuries. Individually, everyday, thousands of humans are going through the awakening of their consciousness about the reality of the world that surrounds them, and feel all sorts of symptoms (you may read here the symptoms of spiritual awakening and here the Indigo children characteristic traits) [the latter is not available in English at this time]. A lot of lightworkers (from the Earth or elsewhere as is the case for the Indigo / Starseeds) are awakening to their true identities and respective missions. A lot of alternative medias are being created every day in the entire world and the alternative information is now plentiful. Internet is overflowing with immense resources for any soul who is awakening and getting its head above water, so as to discover all that there is "beyond the matrix", and all that always existed outside the matrix - All this hidden knowledge, these hidden sciences, and these realities hidden from the "human mass" to the benefit of some, who were able to reign and control this world thanks to this advantage of having at their disposal a knowledge that was not accessible to others, and thanks to various manipulation techniques that humans were, and for many of them still are, not aware of.
Simultaneously, Earth's frequencies have been changing. 2012 marked the beginning of this cycle of the humans' reconnection to what they truly are thanks to the higher frequencies of the Cosmos and of the benevolent extraterrestrial civilisations who are interested in humanity's fate, and who are now able to reach us - since the matrix's grid that was created by the civilisations controlling this planet had been breached. On the one side, those frequencies were sent to us, and on the other side, we have sufficiently evolved on a vibrational level to receive them. Our antennas became and still are becoming more and more subtle, and those transformations continue everyday within each one of us, who have chosen this path towards Reconnection. Like so, little by little, humanity is being divided into two: those who have chosen to follow the path of Consciousness (what we call the spiritual Ascension, the reconnection to our true self), and those who wish to carry on living in the matrix and the negative ego's illusions, a system that was created by "negative" civilisations (who have a negative agenda on planet Earth: the reptilian and draconian civilisations, and luciferian energies) working with the government's highest factions.
We feel this separation every time in our lives we interact with other humans, in our families, amongst our friends, at work, in the streets. We feel as if we suddenly became spectators. As if we were still physically in this reality but in our minds, in a different reality. For a lot of us, this sensation is very disturbing. We then loose all our bearings, those that had been instilled in us since our birth, according to rules and duties created by the matrix, and we now feel lost. If we asked most humans : "who are you?" not allowing them to answer with their name, their job, their birthplace, their age, their gender, their race, a lot of them would not know what to answer. Because we have identified to that. To most humans, all those things represent who they are. But what is left once you take all of that out? The soul is left, this soul which was here all along and was patiently waiting for its physical vehicle to reconnect with it and to stop taking separate routes.
This coming back home is what many of us are currently experiencing. And this coming back home, when it is a real coming back home (and not yet another "false return" through extensions of the matrix - for instance the spiritual matrix with the false light, promising the Earth, spreading lies within profound truths in order to loose even more souls into more belief systems and dogmas) is both extremely powerful and extremely painful. The euphoria of the beginning of discovering all these topics can soon give way to a deep depression and spiritual or existential crisis. Or euphoria can never even happen and give way only to this painful internal crisis - often left without answers nor help - since spiritual communities often prefer to talk about light and "positive" things and reject anything that falls under suffering. Thus, a great many people who are awakening and experiencing profound reconnections feel lonely and isolated, even more so when they see all these spiritual communities where people seem "happy" and radiant. They do not understand what their problem is.
It is very dangerous not to address these topics and to leave those people suffering without any answer. This is the reason why I have decided to write this article. So that all those who are experiencing these symptoms stop thinking they are isolated, abnormal, or that they have a problem. The understanding of what is happening to us is the only thing that will enable us to reclaim our power. The incomprehension is the worst thing that we could go through since who says incomprehension says powerlessness. And powerlessness is the lowest frequency from which a human could operate. Feeling powerless is practically like being dead from the inside. We loose our vital force and we are disconnected from the being we are beyond the veil, trapped in the illusion of this temporary identity locked in an artificial matrix.
The Dark Night of the Soul.
The dark night of the soul is the term commonly used to describe this phase of profound spiritual crisis where all our mind patterns collapse. This phase where we drop the masks we have been wearing or thought we had to be wearing one after the other, where all our former bearings disappear, and where we experience an awakening of consciousness, either progressive or caused by a sudden external event (accident, near death experience, etc.). Depending on the case, the awakening (or reawakening for many of us) will be more or less brutal. And when we are alone to experience it, in our circle, it can be extremely painful, terrifying even. It is quite something to discover that all we have been taught since the beginning about our History and about the reality of this world and the universe was for the most part false, and for a lot of us, souls that have incarnated for specific missions of liberation of the Earth, to realise that we were not crazy when we have been feeling all of this since our birth - that something wasn't quite right and that we were here to accomplish something very important. Our entire life suddenly passes before our eyes at full speed in order to remind us everything we went through and all of a sudden everything starts falling into place.
This puzzle reassembling can trigger profound shocks within us - unexplainable with human words and impossible to comprehend for those who did not experience it. "I knew it" is often the first sentence coming to our minds. I knew it, I have always known! Then follows the anger thinking about all these times we have been rejected for who we were or what we were saying, all these times we have been misunderstood, or ridiculed. Yet we knew. And today we remember. We remember who we are and who we "deep down" have always been. But it is difficult to show the World who we are, who we have always been. Others are so used to this other identity we had been using thus far in order to be accepted amongst them. We have disguised ourselves and today we can no longer bear this costume. This costume disgusts and repels us from the bottom of our beings, we do not wish to wear a single piece of it anymore. But we do not know what to wear instead: we feel naked. "How will I survive in the world the way I am? It is impossible." "How will I be able to carry on working now that I know all of that? Now that I see of all that? How will I be able to do everything I have been doing thus far without questioning? Eat meat? Go to my friend's? Where am I going? What is going to happen to me? Everything is collapsing...". This is generally what we feel when we reconnect to our true being and when our consciousness crosses the barriers of the matrix.
It is the dark night of the soul. It is the death of the negative ego, the part of us that has identified with the matrix for all these years.
The death of the negative ego.
The death of the negative ego (the one created by the matrix and its systems of control over the humans) is experienced literally like mourning. That is to say we go through all the different phases we experience when we loose someone. Here are the 5 stages of mourning commonly accepted (according to Elisabeth Kübler-Ross):
• Denial: "This can not be, it is not possible"
• Anger: "Why is all of this happening to me? Why me? It is too difficult! Why do I have to go through this??"
• Bargaining: "Let me live like I used to, pass me a beer or two..."
• Depression: "There is no way out so why bother?"
• Acceptance: "I am in peace, I know everything will be ok".
A lot of humans still are at the stage of denial. Denial of the existence of extraterrestrial civilisations, denial of their own responsibility towards animal suffering through their food habits, denial of the reality of this world and of who governs it. And denial can even happen to the souls that came here to help humanity with its ascension. The shock is so painful that the first reaction to protect ourselves is to tell ourselves that all this is not true. That all those talking about it are crazy. To get angry and to want to go back to our previous state of unconsciousness, where we were much happier. Besides, many around us tell us that "we have changed" and that we are way less funny since we go to all those weird conferences or since we started listening to those weird people. "What if they were all crazy and so was I?" "No, all this can not be, I need to go back to reality" - along with some attempts to go back to our previous life, to think like we used to, to do the things we used to do, all the while realising it is impossible... We beg, we beg for everything to go back like it was before, in order to not have to feel the way we feel, this discomfort, this exposure, this face to face with ourselves and most of all this sudden responsibility... because who says Consciousness says Responsibility... And in a world of illusions based upon entertainment (to distract us from the truth of our reality), vicarious living through social media, assisted work, and lives and marriages perfectly organised and established on common rules, it is, for many of us, suddenly terrifying to end up with the reins of our own lives (and for many of us, those of the future of humanity) on our hands. All of a sudden we have the entire responsibility of who we are and we can not blame anyone.
And this responsibility, few are ready to take it. Many then sink into the stage of depression, when we do not know where to go, what to do, who to be, and when the task of inner and outer work seems insurmountable. Suicidal thoughts then may rise, and it is critical to understand that this stage is "normal". We have to go through the storm to see the sun again, the sun here will represent newfound clarity. Trust that you will recover this clarity. The only reason why you could stay in this state of denial, or running away, or depression, would be if you had lost faith. So you need to do everything to find that lost faith, and to feel again that behind all of that, there is a universal consciousness (to which yours is connected) and forces there to help you, and that you are not alone. Your higher self is only waiting to take back the reins that were left for too long in your mind's hands and everything that was able to influence it (matrix programming, entities, invisible wars of waves, etc.). This is what the idea of "letting go" is all about. To let go never meant to stop doing anything and to just lay down on your couch until death. Letting go simply means to let go of the control we try to have upon everything that surrounds us. After the dark night of the soul, we understand that it is now impossible to control anything. We MUST let go, we do not have a choice anymore, or else we will end up in great suffering.
We must then learn to live our lives differently, eventually like we should have never stopped living: in the present moment, in the heart, and in trust, like when we were kids, only with more responsibility. We must find this middle ground between purity and innocence, trust, lightness from letting go, and seriousness and responsibility of our incarnation and all that will ensue. Because everything that we are has an impact on everything that surrounds us, to a different scale depending on our actions. And all that we are today will impact what we will be tomorrow, including our future incarnations. It is then irresponsible and wrong to think that "since everything is an illusion, I can just sit back and do nothing, waiting to be freed when I die - since beyond the 3rd physical dimension there is no more duality anyway". It is wrong. Duality exists beyond the 3rd dimension and in even more dimensions above it. Many People from the 4th, 5th, 6th dimensions are at war with the same civilisations that have been manipulating our reality, for eons. And all the indigos and starseeds awakening to their respective missions have these memories anchored within them. As if we had been fighting this fight for eons. It is simply that we are approaching our goal, regarding planet Earth and their grip on the human civilisation. One by one, we are reactivating and reconnecting to our respective "duties" as lightworkers and it is this joining of forces that will allow us to overcome the negative agendas of the shadow government and of the E.T. civilisations working alongside with them (and who are also manipulating them). All those who do not feel like they have a mission for the world should not panic nor feel powerless, your first mission is to evolve as a conscious human yourself. And that is already a lot.
Suggestions for the death of the ego.
• Understand the process of the dark night of the soul and accept it, letting go.
• To not try to run away from what we feel, not look for distraction to avoid facing what we are experiencing or the realities of this World. To not try to overcome it with stimulants or drugs.
• Take great care of ourselves during this phase inducing stress to our bodies and our cells. Do all that we can to destress and relax (activities that we enjoy, baths, sports, body care, massages, relaxing music, etc...)
• Clean our diet - detoxify. Take superfoods (spirulina, antioxidant, vitamins and minerals, ....). Take out toxic foods (white refined sugars, white refined flours, trans fatty acids, pesticides, preservatives, sweeteners) and meat especially red meat. Listen to our callings if our bodies no longer wish to consume animals.
• Sometimes we might feel like eating very little or even fasting. Listen to ourselves and follow what our bodies ask without mentalising it. The spiritual ascension and reconnection process require some transformations within the physical body as well as some adjustments of the immune and nervous systems.
• Rest. We might feel great fatigue during this time of internal mutation and we need to give time to our physical bodies to adjust to the new frequencies. These adjustments cause feelings of heaviness and intense fatigue where it will sometimes feel impossible to get out of bed. Not letting the mind interfere, letting go and allowing ourselves to rest when our bodies ask for it without feeling guilty about all the things we "should be doing". Nothing is more important than our own bodies and our physical and mental health.
• Drink enough water (1,5L per day minimum of a water as pure as possible) and take baths to hydrate the body. During this time of internal transformations the body needs a lot of water to have all this new information circulating and integrated (water being a powerful vehicle of information). Avoid tap water.
Letting go of the negative ego's mask and of the "matrix's personality" is the beginning of what it is to truly Live. To live according to the matrix's codes and according to the mental/ego/terrestrial identification is not really living the way it is when we are reaching out to our higher self, to our soul. It is then that our true life begins and that we understand the real "why" behind this incarnation. The more we let go in this phase of death of the ego / terrestrial identification inherent to this spiritual ascension, the more we can then truly incarnate our higher self in the matter, in our physical body - Which is the true definition of Ascension: to "bring down" the multidimensional consciousness in matter and not to reject matter hoping to become spirit only. This false New Age and religious belief was implanted in people's minds so that humans deny their physical existence and keep on waiting to be "somewhere else" better rather than living fully in the present moment and in their incarnation with its contracts and its fulfilments - both spiritual and in matter (which is perfect for the digressed forces' plan who do not wish to see their system being dismantled and who are infiltrated in all fields in order to systematically incite either apathy, inaction, wait, or escape).
Lightworkers, Indigos, Starseeds.
During this phase, know that you will be more vulnerable than usual. This time of reconnection with your soul might be the time your soul was "waiting" for since you were born (even if it is outside of time space) - but it is also one the forces opposing light and information have been doing everything to prevent from happening since you were born. When we are unconscious, disconnected from who we truly are, we are no "threat" for the systems in place nor for the forces that want to keep their control and their supremacy. Once an individual reconnects to his true nature and therefore to his full power, he becomes a free spirit that needs to be neutralized, especially if this free spirit decides to communicate with his peers and to engage in a snowballing of reconnections, like it is the case for many of us having those missions. We then become more prone than before to attacks mainly psychic, in order to discourage us in our actions, to make us doubt, and to have us give up. Even after the dark night of the soul, when you will have fully reclaimed your power and your will to accomplish what you came here for, to fulfil your calling, you will encounter resistance, all sorts of psychic attacks and external attacks through other humans (who are disconnected from their heart in general and who serve as portals to reach us - or relatives to act upon our emotional layers and make us sink easily at a vibrational level). To understand how they operate is what will truly allow us to be stronger.
Once again, do not stay isolated during those attacks and those difficult times. Connect with other lightworkers (not manipulated by the spiritual matrix). Know as well, that I talk in depth about those topics in my Indigos / Starseeds reconnection courses, organised everywhere in France, Belgium, Switzerland and Quebec, precisely to spread this information to as many people as possible and to all those who need it, since my own reconnection has happened already and I am now being guided towards the rest of my work here (which we all are, but more or less clearly depending on our degree of reconnection and the evolution of our own intuitive senses). It is important to understand how these attacks work in order to avoid being caught in the infernal spiral of self-sabotage, of suicidal thoughts or of intensified demeaning that are the types of mental attacks most common amongst souls with a mission for the Earth and humanity - especially those who must disclose truths that bother and threaten the systems in place.
We must be strong to accomplish what we have to accomplish down here. The resistance we are facing is intensifying in order to have us give up. Do not give up, you are not alone. We have been through the most difficult part, which was isolation from our birth, separated from others who came for the same reasons, from our brothers and sisters, and we have experienced great suffering from this loneliness and from the incomprehension of everything we have been feeling since we were little. But now that we understand why we are here and what is happening, and now that we can reconnect with each other, everything will be different. It is this union that really threatens those digressed forces who know their time is now up, before the truth is exposed and humanity stops giving its consent to what destroys it and what destroys its Earth. There will be many attempts to try and divide lightworkers, do not let those techniques of "divide and rule" undermine you. Bear in mind that they will go through any weakness, and any means to get to you on a vibrational level. And when we fall vibrationally, either because of a physical fatigue or a psychic or emotional intrusion, we then enter their realm of low frequencies where they know exactly what to do to manipulate us. We must stay out of these frequencies by staying in the vibration of the heart and in the present moment as much as possible. This goes for all humans.
Note: We should not feel bad or "inferior" if we do not feel like we have a mission for the World. Each soul has its value and once again your greatest mission is already your own spiritual evolution, which is already a lot, as well as the impact upon your direct circle. Everything else will naturally follow. Do not add pressure upon yourself. We must first know how to care for ourselves before being able to help others. Those who feel they need to help others, have it programmed within them since their birth and therefore are prepared and naturally able to do so. If it is not a true internal calling, then listen to yourself without feeling guilty. This does not lessen your responsibility towards yourself and the World, but do not focus on finding a "mission" if it is not something that resonates with you like it does with the indigos for instance for whom it is a very clear feeling. Do not forget that each soul is different, with a different journey, and has different intentions of incarnation, with different agendas. From now on only take what resonates within you with each reading on the topics. Since my own mission is clearly, mainly, about the guidance of the indigos / starseeds, I must address the information needed for their own journey because souls of the indigos / starseeds races have very specific tasks on planet Earth and must reconnect to them.
In spite of the difficulties encountered so far for all of us, or the pain from this dark night of the soul, or the feeling of panic we could be experiencing during those times of profound changes, know that there could not be anything more beautiful than to open your eyes upon the Truth. Of course it is easier to keep them closed, and that, very often, is what you will be told in your mind, giving you the illusion that you will be happier. But what use is there to being happy in something that is fake. Better to face what is real, even if it is not enjoyable at first, in order to transform it. Ignoring what "negativity" is happening on Earth or in the Universe will never make it stop. It is by no mean about focusing on the negative to feed it but about being able to face it to then find the appropriate solutions, in our centre, without loosing our vibrational alignment. When we are in denial of a problem (within us or in the World, in the Universe), we are also in denial of a possible solution to be found. To lift the veil on what "negativity" is happening in the World will actually allow a whole range of action plans and solutions to arise, thanks to the work of all those who vowed upon incarnation to come work for the emancipation of humanity and to help it spiritually ascend - and to all those wishing in their hearts to join us once their field of consciousness has expanded.
We are living unprecedented times. We are living this point in time so many souls came to prepare, this moment for which so many have died and have given their lives for. Many have sacrificed themselves so that today, we could be free. Many have died, beheaded, burnt, locked, for denouncing the oppression in place and for disclosing certain truths. It would be a crime today not to follow up their work, to refuse to see what is, in order to simply keep the comfort of our illusion. An illusion so well orchestrated and put together, like a joyful painting on the façade of a worn down wall. This worn down wall is this ancient world currently collapsing, along with everything attached to it (what attached us to it), to allow a more conscious, a more responsible world to emerge. A world connected, where each free spirit is conscious of the impact of all his thoughts and actions in the entire Universe.
Laura Marie - November 2015 Newsletter - Dark Night of the Soul (Spiritual Crisis and Rebirth) - HarmonicUniverse.Academy
Translated from French by Melissa from Sovereign · Planet.
Original article in French by Laura Marie from the Harmonic Universe Academy:
- La Nuit Noire de l'Âme (Crise Spirituelle et Renaissance): https://harmonicuniverse.academy/ressources/newsletters-mensuelles-ascension/86-la-nuit-noire-de-l-ame-crise-spirituelle-renaissance
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Recommended readings on Sovereign · Planet:
- The Authentic Self - blogpost on Sovereign · Planet
- Indigo and Starseed Families - blogpost on Sovereign · Planet
- Disclosure Timelines and Preparation - article on Sovereign · Planet